evolving of ideals, while remaining the same to a degree.

I have a secret journal in which certain blogs have ended up in the past, rather than reveal to the full public.  However, sometimes it’s interesting to look back at previous entries and see the progression.  In January, while parusing a forum, the question of what an ideal mate came about.  Given my recent rush of suitors, I thought it would be interesting to take a look to see if I’ve evolved or stayed the same.  To some degree, much of this is still current.  Additions are added in between the asterisks.

So here’s your chance to take a peek and see what makes me croon.  Take notes if necessary.

my ideal guy:

-non shallow traits-
1)Intelligent. Linguists, writers, and philosophers kill me.  You have to have a quick wit and sharp tongue abound you, or it simply won’t do either of us any good.  I’m extremely interested in pop culture as well as tech.  So therefore I also adore techies, codies and numberologists. *I’ve also noticed a trend toward science majors and well read men.  A man that can write, can drive me wild.  Words may be superfluous but my god the man who can craft with them in a genuine manner… gives me wet panties.* Open minds need only apply within.

2)Excellent formal etiquette.  Believe it or not, despite the name, I cannot STAND certain behaviors.  Table and bedside manners with a crowd differentiate between ones with just him and I.  Ever hear the expression watch how he treats his waitress because thats a clue to how he’ll treat you? It’s true.  And NOT overrated.

3)Charismatic.  Not just a charmer.. but genuine.  *This is an absolute must have with the crowd I hang around with.. I want someone who is going to be able to hold their own, at the same time they are holding my hand.*

4)Passionate, strong willed and determined. Driven to succeed.  Even to the point of workaholic.  And to a degree, a dickhead.  Why?  Because in the end, they get the job done and don’t bs through it.  Plus I want someone to tell me stfu when I’m acting like a “vagina.”  Let’s face it we all need it sometimes.  And any lover I have that’s there for the long run had better have it or I’ll get bored with the doormat.

5)Sense of humor. From a mature sense to the absolute vulgarist I-can’t-believe-you-laughed-at-that-because-that’s-offensive style to you’re-a-moron that’s not even funny.  I’m a sucker for funny… or rather HilArIous. *Bonus for comedy writers that can actually write.*

6)Chivalry is not dead.  But man sometimes it sure feels like it. This is one area where I’m extremely traditional.  It’s little things like opening doors, offering the coat off your back when its cold or theres a puddle, giving her the last bite of cake… and I’m big into being fed tastings of meals or even offered.
Oh and kisses on the forehead… /swoon
It’s a matter of heart and devotion, and goes hand in hand with…

7)Public Displays of Affection.  We don’t even have to go into the sexual part (though public.. affection.. yes please with my man.. ooo) but some men just want to hide you.  What is that about?  I want a man who’s proud to be my man and not afraid to show off to the rest.  I love when a man kisses me in front of his friends.  Takes me out to parties to be his arm candy.  Ok so maybe it’s partially shallow.. but this is my list so I’m allowed right?

8)Artistically inclined.  Even if it’s just an interest, it’s got to be there.  Or else we’re not going to have much to relate to.  This is not limited to just conventional styles of art or music.  I love a variety of urban off kilter and niche hobbies.  Strong emphasis on nostalgic most everything.  If you dance or sing (and i mean melt me kinda voice- only happened once in my life) then you win bonus points.  Even more so if it’s jazz or swing. *Living in the heart of the entertainment industry, I won’t lie & say.. I’m not in heaven with a pleathora of artistic mindes all around.. mmm*

9)Spiritually, “religiously” and politically open minded.  I don’t care if you have your opinion.. in fact I love it even if yours is different (maybe not right though specifically if it’s not mine 😉 but don’t stomp all over mine.  Lets discuss, debate, wash our brains out.  In other words, we’ll pretend it’s Christianity…hey now I’m not an atheist but I’m also a client. You get me?  Good. Or erm.. bad? =) *Actually now I can safely say with confidence that’s my standpoint, however still.. *

10)Not demanding or needy.  I don’t have time to babysit a man.  Though sometimes it’s fun to raise 25+ year old men in a masochistic humanitarian sort of angle… no.  I’ll take a big heap of passing on that one.  I’m fairly comfortable on my own doing my own thing.  If we want to be together that minute we will, if not, stop sniveling like a baby.  We don’t need to be attached 24/7

11)Unattainable.  What can I say, I’m a sucker for a challenge.  When it’s too easy, I don’t want it.  I get bored.  I’m unattainable and I want the same thing.  Work for me and I’ll work for you.  My expectations are too high?  Well, I’ll give you the same thing.

12)Privacy. Respect for my decisions even if they don’t agree with them.  My problems, my choices.. if I want or need your help or advice, I’ll ask you.  If not, then don’t press.  If you do, it will just push me away.. most everytime.

Now there was a shallow version to go with this, as well as a pictorial, but perhaps another day.  Very few real differences.. same path, different direction.