I haven’t been this glowy and happy since I first found out that I was going to be a mom again. It’s ridiculously cheesy and sometimes I can be both ridiculous and cheesy so, for those of you already in the know, there it is… and for those of you not in the know.. you were warned.
Also a fair warning that this is not going to be the most grammatically correct or strict form of flowing words as I usually try to adhere to. Blame the caffeine. Blame the excitement. Blame the… surge of happiness I am currently feeling after so many hardships that…
But that’s for another entry.
Awhile back I mentioned that my grandmother was very ill. Combine that with her husband (also of great importance and inspiration to me) having progressively bad Alzheimer’s, I knew that this baby would be important for them. It was one of my “bargaining chips” to hopefully entice them to hold on a bit longer.
“Gram you have to stick around and meet your new grandchild. I plan on naming the baby after you if it’s a girl.”
My grandparents’ names are Aldo and Anita. Sincerely, they are two of the most amazing souls on the planet. But while I’m happy and enjoy my grandmother’s name, I’m not a huge fan of my grandfather’s… despite my fixation for older style names in general.
Flashback to what feels like another lifetime ago…
When my ex husband fled the state and took two of my children with him.
It devastated me.
For obvious reasons.
My middle and youngest children were so little when he left… and stole those memories from me. Memories worth far more than any dollar amount… and unfortunately that’s what it seems like it’s going to take to fight him about it.
Again… another blog.
I have one son and one daughter with him. My daughter Sakura was one of the two children taken from me by my husband. She was less than a year old when it happened. He gave those memories to another woman who couldn’t have children of her own… until she later did with my now ex husband. While I love all of my children the same, I really didn’t get the opportunity to have those little bitty moments with my daughter. It is especially hard for me.
Back to present day again-
I had been hoping for Anita. The idea of it made my grandmother beam rays of happiness through her tears on the phone line when I first told her.
I was told to drink a ton of fluids to help get an accurate picture of the baby. This baby, however, was wide awake and playful, and didn’t want to give up the secret of what the sex was just yet.
But rather than keep it suspenseful more, even though I know very well I could hook you for more clicks, I’ll… tell you another story first.
My child’s father, Bear, told me that he had a dream a long time ago about the sex of a baby he was going to have. It unfortunately did not happen. It has brought him a bit of sadness as well.
Hopefully…. that changed a bit yesterday when I told him the news. (Spoiler alert… it did!)
Little Bear moved around a lot during my ultrasound. My child likes to hang out in my lung capacity to give me the most heartburn possible. The two sonographers doing the test were taking a long time trying to get Little Bear to remain still enough to figure out what was there. Like Bear, Little Bear did NOT want to be photographed.
I got a bit of video from the ultrasound… two videos actually that I will post in a later edition. Little Bear moved around soooo much that unfortunately the sex was not determined in those videos.
The next stenographer came in the room. This was the woman who was supposed to tell me the sex. I couldn’t get any more pictures or video. However… the hospital gave me a DISK of pictures. Those will be loaded onto the proper channels in due time.
(Ha.. due time)
But back to it… Little Bear finally DID cooperate. And although Little Bear tried his best to cover up and dodge the view…
I need-a new name…
That little boy his father dreamed about then… is happening now. I officially have become a bit of a 50’s show with this now… third son of mine.
That said, as I was originally set on having a daughter I did not really think of a lot of boy names. My other sons names are Ethan Raphael and Maddox Conner. Ethan’s name was originally going to be Trent Xavier- after the Daria character and the X-men character. My daughter is named Sakura Faye (after Faye Dunaway and Faye Valentine from Cowboy Bebop). As you might have been able to summarize, I have a soft spot for comic/pop culture related names and old fashioned ones. Bear’s father and I are also fans of great writer’s names.
Have an idea about a name? Please feel free to leave it in the comments.
I am an Enigma 
