I tossed and turned all last night again. I couldn’t sleep… I was haunted by my own pettiness. I wanted things to work out. I was hoping that maybe after some cooling down they would. Washing my face this morning and looking in the mirror… the ghost had been unleashed and now the one person who knew all my secrets– has essentially become my enemy.
And it’s my own damn fault.
All I could think about yesterday was that situation. How I hoped they would accept my apology, but instead…
I think they very well likely are gone. And I’m getting a dose of my own medicine just to torture myself here… on the very place I first began to talk to him… on the very place I met the person that lead me to her.
What’s weird? The whole thing with Big never hurt me this much.
It looks like another beach day is in order. I have an interview later though, so it can’t be today. Lunch with a friend of mine I haven’t seen in years on Tuesday afternoon. I need some more detoxing.