I take a risk about putting my personal life here on the interweb, everytime I do it. But there’s no secret to the statement- “I censor myself selectively.” What I write here are facts.. and what I write tends to also involve other people.
Therefore when I say that I am not confirming nor denying anything- it is out of respect for all parties involved. You may think that you know, but I can assure you that unless you are one of the other parties directly involved, you do not. And as much as I appreciate the whistleblowing that has been going on- I’m a big girl here and am of full responsibility for my actions, weather it is a product of my own stupidity or of one that my heart is invested in.
I will admit, I have some fucked up relationships. I have some fucked up non relationships. But they’re mine, and I have every right to have them.
Now- some meta responses:
I got an email from someone who had commented on this blog… I was going to respond to it in private, I decided against it.. because I found it slightly funny that said person warned about someone saving them and a woman who needs to be saved but wrote “I wanted to reach out to you” in their email.
So to clarify:
a- I am not looking for anyone to save me. Things may not be perfect, but I’m working on myself to make them better. Which is what I believe every person needs to do. I do not believe in imaginary heroes. I believe in being your own hero first.
b- I am not looking to change anyone. If something I say or do inspires someone to change on their own- then that’s their decision. I do like to say and challenge people to be more. I am on a quest to find answers and be a better person myself. People can be however they want to be.
c- I’d like to think I know a little bit about what makes a great man, and what makes a great woman. I know many great men and women in training.. but I also will say that I know and have dated ones that are closer to that mark then normal. At least in my opinion.
d- My last post (not the meta response one) was semi related to the movie/comic book, as it was to other things that are literally intertwined with a story involving said caped crusader and a romeo who is aptly called the dark horse due to his connection with a particular comic book label… well technically 2 comic book labels actually.. but that’s heh, his story (literally again).
Now onto the next digital assumption:
I have gotten warnings from people about people I’ve dated/am dating/have history with.
I find them quite humorous.
Why? Because I don’t do that to other people.
In fact, as far as womanhood is conserned, I abhore the whole concept of it. Yet, I know there are sites devoted to just this purpose.
I base every relationship I have with person A on my own interactions with that person. Which may be completely different than person B.
Have I ever been with a man with wandering eyes? I have wandering eyes. If there are eyes wandering on their part- its either a)understood, or b)ended. If I’m not enough of a woman to keep their eyes focused on me in their presense, well then I wasn’t being enough of a woman or.. I wasn’t the woman for them. At which point, I get over it, and move on.
If a man disrespects me, they get a piece of my mind and on extreme occasion a slap in the face if absolutely necessary. I have no problem showing a man my displeasure for them.
I tend to have few women friends for a reason.. I don’t want drama. However when a man comes into the picture, it seems to end up like that.
Now when you get in the middle of something that’s none of your business- though kind hearted or caring your intentions may be, please kindly back away. If it’s a problem, I will deal with it. With that person, in private.
And now that it’s noon, I really need to get some things done. I wonder if the dark horse installed MSN or even is awake yet… and I want Chinese and Pac Man.