Where’s the line?
Way over there most of the time.
As a fetishist… as a bit of a deviant… the buck doesn’t stop there. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again- I’m looking for that brutal prince. Nice guys finish last- unless balanced with the proper degree of douchebaggery.
“Fucked up is the new awesome.”
Indeed. But not new for me.
I give so many people more credit than they deserve. I rarely catagorize someone as a lost cause. It just doesn’t work for me. Ah yes, I’m emotionally masochistic. However, I’m well aware of it, and not as vulnerable as one would think.
“It’s only being used if you are not aware of what’s going on.” I recently told a friend.
I firmly believe that.
Everytime I go into any relationship or dating situation- I am in constant observation mode.
I deal with bullshit, yes. But I also put my foot down.
I am frighteningly perceptive and intuitive. What you see on the outside.. is only a small bit of the collection of rabbit holes in my mind. If I’ve fucked up socially or otherwise, I am my worst enemy. I bounce back, despite celebrity style escapades.
I’ve become so used to things being this way, that when a genuinely nice guy comes into the picture that treats me pseudo conventional good-esque, it boggles me. Like this week with the dark horse… and what’s worse, is I also find myself most attracted to the ones who are not local.
Single life is amazing. I wouldn’t have it any other way in some ways. I truly enjoy this cat and mouse game. But when the day comes around when…
I want to be ready. Who knows when that will be. Only time will tell right?